Also, they liked this one in the Daily Briar Photoshoot folder. !00% clean joke.....
A Frog goes into a bank to get a loan. He approaches the woman at the loan application desk and notes that her name tag reads: Patty Whack. The Frog says, "Excuse me, I'd like to apply for a loan." The woman, very surprised that a talking frog was in her bank immediately refuses, saying, "We only work with humans, no animals can get loans here....besides, you don't have any collateral." The Frog hurriedly pulls a small statuette of a badger from his pocket. "Yes I do! Take this little badger. It means the world to me." At this point the woman, Ms. Whack is upset and goes to the bank's President. "Sir, there is a frog outside trying to get a loan from us. He won't leave and he says this little badger thing is enough collateral!" The President takes the doll, looks it over very carefully and says, "IT'S A KNICK KNACK, PATTY WHACK! NOW GIVE THE FROG A LOAN!"
Well, this explains everything.... ("I found it on the web and it followed me home.....")
<<We have all experienced it, but now it is scientifically explained! Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.>>
@motie2, I suppose it is necessary to have a bit of a sadistic streak, to find the humor in Mr. Bill. I always viewed the skit, as something you might find a really mean 8 year old kid involved in.
@xDutchx -- But, exactly! A clearer illustration were the skits on a short lived Saturday-Night-Live-like TV show on Friday nights after the 11 o'clock news called "Fridays." https://tinyurl.com/y9odv4n7
Clever. Anyways, Michael Richards would play a ten year old with toy soldiers, holding conversations, giving orders, and blowing up toy tanks with firecrackers. Puerile humor, but it was funny. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GIUxoytpcxE Enjoy!
@motie2, I had forgotten all about that show! Adults can be cruel especially when there is monetary gain, but kids will be cruel just for the entertainment value.
Because children are like that, the following children get more than their share of crap growing up: any child who is different -- too fat, too this, too tall, too short, thick glasses, speech defect, wrong color, too smart, too slow (although the too smarts could cover up and avoid censure), the wrong religion, even the wrong color hair. I watched all this as a teacher of students from third grade through high school.
@motie2, I agree, that is just one reason why some parents have chosen to home school. I can only imagine how hard it is to have the responsibility of protecting a child, and then have to face the reality of enrolling them in certain schools.
Comments
A Frog goes into a bank to get a loan. He approaches the woman at the loan application desk and notes that her name tag reads: Patty Whack. The Frog says, "Excuse me, I'd like to apply for a loan." The woman, very surprised that a talking frog was in her bank immediately refuses, saying, "We only work with humans, no animals can get loans here....besides, you don't have any collateral." The Frog hurriedly pulls a small statuette of a badger from his pocket. "Yes I do! Take this little badger. It means the world to me." At this point the woman, Ms. Whack is upset and goes to the bank's President. "Sir, there is a frog outside trying to get a loan from us. He won't leave and he says this little badger thing is enough collateral!" The President takes the doll, looks it over very carefully and says, "IT'S A KNICK KNACK, PATTY WHACK! NOW GIVE THE FROG A LOAN!"
Newest adventures of the Pipe Smoking Man
<<We have all experienced it, but now it is scientifically explained! Research has led to the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.>>
Clever. Anyways, Michael Richards would play a ten year old with toy soldiers, holding conversations, giving orders, and blowing up toy tanks with firecrackers. Puerile humor, but it was funny.
A clip from one of my favorite movies of all time.....