At the risk of running roughshod over the entire membership, I would like to apologize in advance, for the joke I am about to tell, as I will most likely be found guilty of universityism, regionism, as well as collegiateism, but this one is a classic, and made the rounds back in the early 80's, when Bear Bryant was stalking the sidelines. I would also like to apologize in advance to Nebraska fans, as well as those who empathize with Nebraska fans.
So, there was this Arkie, who had dreams of seeing the west coast. He had considered getting on a plane, but he had a fear of flying more severe than B.A. Baracus. His old pickup was reliable locally, but he would need some luck in driving it out to the west coast and back.
Determined to see the west coast, the Arkie burns through Louisiana, Texas, and straight into the heat of New Mexico on I-20. Not long after crossing the New Mexico state line, his pickup overheats, forcing him to pull to the shoulder, and get out and start walking.
Shortly after making his way through the New Mexico desert, he encounters three college football players, one from Alabama, one from Tennessee, and another from Nebraska. The Alabama player was carrying a water jug, the Tennessee player was carrying an umbrella, and the Nebraska player was dragging a car door. The Arkie noted that the Nebraska player was bigger than the Alabama and the Tennessee player put together.
So the Arkie asks the Alabama player, "What are you doing with that water jug?" The Alabama player replied, "When I get thirsty, I will have something to drink."
Next the Arkie asks the Tennessee player, "What are you doing with that umbrella?" To which the Tennesse player replied, "When that sun starts beating down, I will be able to get me some shade."
Finally, the Arkie asks the Nebraska player, "What are you doing with that car door?" The Nebraska player looked at him and proudly replied, "When it gets hot, I am going to roll the window down!"
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnIjtyplKNU
There ya go baby, send another text message............
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxVQ7ZEG1RU
At the risk of running roughshod over the entire membership, I would like to apologize in advance, for the joke I am about to tell, as I will most likely be found guilty of universityism, regionism, as well as collegiateism, but this one is a classic, and made the rounds back in the early 80's, when Bear Bryant was stalking the sidelines. I would also like to apologize in advance to Nebraska fans, as well as those who empathize with Nebraska fans.
So, there was this Arkie, who had dreams of seeing the west coast. He had considered getting on a plane, but he had a fear of flying more severe than B.A. Baracus. His old pickup was reliable locally, but he would need some luck in driving it out to the west coast and back.
Determined to see the west coast, the Arkie burns through Louisiana, Texas, and straight into the heat of New Mexico on I-20. Not long after crossing the New Mexico state line, his pickup overheats, forcing him to pull to the shoulder, and get out and start walking.
Shortly after making his way through the New Mexico desert, he encounters three college football players, one from Alabama, one from Tennessee, and another from Nebraska. The Alabama player was carrying a water jug, the Tennessee player was carrying an umbrella, and the Nebraska player was dragging a car door. The Arkie noted that the Nebraska player was bigger than the Alabama and the Tennessee player put together.
So the Arkie asks the Alabama player, "What are you doing with that water jug?" The Alabama player replied, "When I get thirsty, I will have something to drink."
Next the Arkie asks the Tennessee player, "What are you doing with that umbrella?" To which the Tennesse player replied, "When that sun starts beating down, I will be able to get me some shade."
Finally, the Arkie asks the Nebraska player, "What are you doing with that car door?" The Nebraska player looked at him and proudly replied, "When it gets hot, I am going to roll the window down!"
When a man names his daughter after my favorite island in Scotland, you know in your heart she is going to be extra special.......
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=98K2gexgxhw
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANHaaHQ5jtw