@motie2, Any financial advisor will tell you, that one of the basics of successful financial planning, is to track and record your expenditures. Just sayin......
"Ladies and gentlemen: the story you are about to read is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the guilty.".
So I used to have a bulldog named "Zeke." Like most Terrier's, he was extremely playful, and full of energy. He loved to chase any rabbit or skwerl that came anywhere close to the property. He was good about leaving small pets alone, such as Poodles or Pomeranians, and would sometimes roll around and playfully bite them, being careful not to hurt them.
However, any large breed dog, such as a Rottweiler, German Shepard, or Doberman Pinscher would always get his immediate attention. Lucky for me, none of my neighbors had any of the large breeds, but I did have a neighbor who had a cat he affectionately named Ol' Tom. Ol' Tom was a daredevil, with an addiction to adrenaline flow apparently, and as a result spent a great deal of time on the roof of houses in our neighborhood, as well as the tops of trees. Zeke had a tendency to shadow his every move, but didn't have the ability to climb as high. Anytime they were both on the ground with equal footing, it was on. Tom had a tendency to roam, and would sometimes stay gone for 3 or 4 days, so his owner was not too attached to him, I hoped.
I tried talking to Zeke about the situation, trying to explain to him that a small housecat was not a legitimate challenge for a bulldog of his caliber, and certainly not a threat to his dominance.. He would just look at me and grin and pant. The problem was that every chance Tom got, he would try to challenge Zeke, and Zeke without hesitation would accept the challenge.
So one night, I came home around 1am, and could see Zeke in my headlights, sitting on the front porch grinning. I got out of my pickup, and as I walked up the sidewalk, I spotted Tom laying lifeless at the bottom of the steps. I looked at Zeke, and he was still grinning at me. Ol' Tom was wet, covered with mud, and really looked like he had been run through the wringer.
I picked Ol' Tom up, and it was obvious that he had passed on to the other side. I began to try and think of a way to break the news to my neighbor, that would keep me from having to pay for a cat. Being that it was so late, I knew my odds would be better, if I waited till my neighbor was up and about the next day. I took Ol' Tom into my laundry room and closed the door to keep the distance between him and Zeke, then headed off to bed.
As I lay there staring at the ceiling, I found it very hard to fall asleep. Thoughts of how I should handle the situation continued to run through my head. All of a sudden, I had an epifanny. I sprang from my bed, and made a beeline for the study, to fetch my carbide light, and my loop. Yes, the same loop I use to check for sand pits and faded nomenclature.
I made another beeline for the laundry room, with the intention of giving Ol' Tom an inspection. After carefully going over Tom with the loop, I could find zero puncture wounds and no petechial hemorrhaging. In some cases, when a bulldog hits an intended target, the spine will instantly break, and without an official autopsy, it may look as though the animal has died of natural causes. It was at this point, that I devised a plan. I took Ol' Tom out to the mop sink, for a thorough bath. I fetched some of my girlfriends Bath and Body Works scented fragrant body wash. After a thorough soaping and rinsing, I went and fetched my old blow dryer, which I had no further use for, except in situations such as this.
I'll have to admit, when I got through with Ol' Tom, he was still a little stiff, but looked good as new. By now, it was around 3am, so I fetched a pipe and headed out to the porch to sit a spell. I wanted to patiently survey my surroundings, to make sure that everyone was still nestled snugly in their beds. Once I was certain that the coast was clear, I lovingly ran Ol' Tom back over to his owners front porch, and placed him carefully into his bed. Luckily for me, the heat from the blow dryer, had made him a little more pliable. I quickly scurried back to my own front porch, hoping that any Gladys Kravitz in the neighborhood was none the wiser.
The entire next day, I heard nary a word. Then a week passed, and then a month, then two, then three. At this point, I finally got my courage up, to strike up a conversation with my neighbor, to see what he thought had became of his cat. After some casual conversation, I asked, "What ever became of your buddy "Ol' Tom? I haven't seen him around in months."
He replied, "You know the strangest thing happened with that cat. He died in his sleep one night, and the next day I buried him down by the creek. Then 3 days later, he showed back up in his bed on the front porch."
"Alive?" I asked.
"No not alive." He responded.
"Well, I thought when you said 3 days, maybe we were dealing with a resurrection." I responded.
I could tell the guy was starting to get misty eyed. That's when he told me that he had buried Ol' Tom alive. He described how he went back down to the creek, and could see how Ol' Tom had clawed his way out of the grave, and must have had enough life left in him, to make it back up to the porch, and back into his favorite bed.
I responded by telling him that I have heard a lot of stories about animals making it back home under tremendous circumstances, but this one takes the cake.
I immediately told him, that he didn't need to breathe a word of this to anyone, because if the Humane Society or PETA got wind of it, the media would be camped out on both our doorsteps, and I don't want to answer any questions about what kind of neighbor he is.
He agreed with me, that discretion would be best for everyone concerned.
I turned and made my way back to the house, and there sitting at the top of the steps was Zeke, grinning from ear to ear. I petted him, got him a fresh rawhide chew, and took him back inside.
"10 Facts about Tobacco Pipes That Will Blow Your Mind" (Well, my mind wasn't blown, but I learned a few things......)
<<Smoking tobacco from a pipe is a pastime that most associate with luxury, a good time, and sometimes even fuzzy slippers. While smoking and collecting pipes has become a hobby for some, it didn’t start out that way. Check out a few of these crazy facts about smoking pipe tobacco; they just might make you enjoy that next puff a little bit more!
Smoking a pipe first began as part of religious ceremonies. As part of many American Indian rituals, the shamans, priests, and medicine men all used to smoke pipes. It was thought that the smoke that emerged from the tobacco was holy. In many cases, it was used to cure illnesses or drive away evil spirits and curses.
During the 16th century in England, it was thought that smoking pipe tobacco was extremely beneficial to one’s health. This was based on the four humors theory by Galen. He suggested that the body was composed of hot, cold, wet, and dry humors. Smoking a pipe was considered a dry humor because it heated the body, dried it, and left it in a state of happiness or vigor.
In 1500 BC, North American Indians began using the pipe for other ceremonial purposes—reconciliation. During this ceremony, everyone would sit in a circle and take a puff from the same pipe as a symbol of unity and peace.
In 1580, the first pipe was mass-produced. It was a chalk pipe and was mainly used by sailors.
Pipe smoking became more and more popular during the Thirty Years’ War in Europe during the years of 1618–1648. Before this time, it was considered treasonous in many countries for anyone but aristocrats and royals to smoke.
Switzerland actually put a ban on smoking pipes. In 1586, it was included in the revised Ten Commandments and considered illegal to smoke. The punishment for smoking was extremely severe.
Tobacco became famous in Europe after Christopher Columbus discovered the Americas. Once he saw that the Native American people were using it for medicinal purposes and to smoke out of pipes, he took it back to Spain with him. The tobacco plant later reached Europe in 1519 by way of Ramon Pane, a monk who accompanied Columbus on his voyage.
Pipes have been made out of different types of material. Iron pipes were popular in Norway for a time, while clay pipes were the most popular among the natives in the Americas. Later, Meerschaum was discovered and used to create the smoking device. Then in 1840, briar pipes became popular and still remain one of the most popular types of pipes.
The term “smoking” was coined in the 17th Before then, smoking was called “dry drunkenness” or “puffing.”
In the mid-16th century, many European countries thought that smoking pipe tobacco could cure syphilis.>>
"10 Facts about Tobacco Pipes That Will Blow Your Mind"
Smoking tobacco from a pipe is a pastime that most associate with luxury, a good time, and sometimes even fuzzy slippers. While smoking and collecting pipes has become a hobby for some, it didn’t start out that way. Check out a few of these crazy facts about smoking pipe tobacco; they just might make you enjoy that next puff a little bit more!
1) Smoking a pipe first began as part of religious ceremonies. As part of many American Indian rituals, the shamans, priests, and medicine men all used to smoke pipes. It was thought that the smoke that emerged from the tobacco was holy. In many cases, it was used to cure illnesses or drive away evil spirits and curses.
2) During the 16th Century in England, it was thought that smoking pipe tobacco was extremely beneficial to one’s health. This was based on the four humors theory by Galen. He suggested that the body was composed of hot, cold, wet, and dry humors. Smoking a pipe was considered a dry humor because it heated the body, dried it, and left it in a state of happiness or vigor.
3)In 1500 BC, North American Indians began using the pipe for other ceremonial purposes—reconciliation. During this ceremony, everyone would sit in a circle and take a puff from the same pipe as a symbol of unity and peace.
4) In 1580, the first pipe was mass-produced. It was a chalk pipe and was mainly used by sailors.
5) Pipe smoking became more and more popular during the Thirty Years’ War in Europe during the years of 1618–1648. Before this time, it was considered treasonous in many countries for anyone but aristocrats and royals to smoke.
6) Switzerland actually put a ban on smoking pipes. In 1586, it was included in the revised Ten Commandments and considered illegal to smoke. The punishment for smoking was extremely severe. 7) Tobacco became famous in Europe after Christopher Columbus discovered the Americas. Once he saw that the Native American people were using it for medicinal purposes and to smoke out of pipes, he took it back to Spain with him. The tobacco plant later reached Europe in 1519 by way of Ramon Pane, a monk who accompanied Columbus on his voyage.
8) Pipes have been made out of different types of material. Iron pipes were popular in Norway for a time, while clay pipes were the most popular among the natives in the Americas. Later, Meerschaum was discovered and used to create the smoking device. Then in 1840, briar pipes became popular and still remain one of the most popular types of pipes.
9) The term “smoking” was coined in the 17th Before then, smoking was called “dry drunkenness” or “puffing.”
10) In the mid-16th century, many European countries thought that smoking pipe tobacco could cure syphilis.
Note: Snce posting the above a few minutes ago, I find I cannot access the URL. I get a message that reads, "Your PHP installation appears to be missing the MySQL extension which is required by WordPress." Being that I am 71 and uncool, I have no idea what that means or what changed in the last few minutes. I'm glad I posted the text instead of just the URL.
@motie2 I believe @mfresa is correct. Basically your computer was thinking that you were trying to create or access the behind the scenes structure of a website.
Comments
"Ladies and gentlemen: the story you are about to read is true. Only the names have been changed to protect the guilty.".
So I used to have a bulldog named "Zeke." Like most Terrier's, he was extremely playful, and full of energy. He loved to chase any rabbit or skwerl that came anywhere close to the property. He was good about leaving small pets alone, such as Poodles or Pomeranians, and would sometimes roll around and playfully bite them, being careful not to hurt them.
However, any large breed dog, such as a Rottweiler, German Shepard, or Doberman Pinscher would always get his immediate attention. Lucky for me, none of my neighbors had any of the large breeds, but I did have a neighbor who had a cat he affectionately named Ol' Tom. Ol' Tom was a daredevil, with an addiction to adrenaline flow apparently, and as a result spent a great deal of time on the roof of houses in our neighborhood, as well as the tops of trees. Zeke had a tendency to shadow his every move, but didn't have the ability to climb as high. Anytime they were both on the ground with equal footing, it was on. Tom had a tendency to roam, and would sometimes stay gone for 3 or 4 days, so his owner was not too attached to him, I hoped.
I tried talking to Zeke about the situation, trying to explain to him that a small housecat was not a legitimate challenge for a bulldog of his caliber, and certainly not a threat to his dominance.. He would just look at me and grin and pant. The problem was that every chance Tom got, he would try to challenge Zeke, and Zeke without hesitation would accept the challenge.
So one night, I came home around 1am, and could see Zeke in my headlights, sitting on the front porch grinning. I got out of my pickup, and as I walked up the sidewalk, I spotted Tom laying lifeless at the bottom of the steps. I looked at Zeke, and he was still grinning at me. Ol' Tom was wet, covered with mud, and really looked like he had been run through the wringer.
I picked Ol' Tom up, and it was obvious that he had passed on to the other side. I began to try and think of a way to break the news to my neighbor, that would keep me from having to pay for a cat. Being that it was so late, I knew my odds would be better, if I waited till my neighbor was up and about the next day. I took Ol' Tom into my laundry room and closed the door to keep the distance between him and Zeke, then headed off to bed.
As I lay there staring at the ceiling, I found it very hard to fall asleep. Thoughts of how I should handle the situation continued to run through my head. All of a sudden, I had an epifanny. I sprang from my bed, and made a beeline for the study, to fetch my carbide light, and my loop. Yes, the same loop I use to check for sand pits and faded nomenclature.
I made another beeline for the laundry room, with the intention of giving Ol' Tom an inspection. After carefully going over Tom with the loop, I could find zero puncture wounds and no petechial hemorrhaging. In some cases, when a bulldog hits an intended target, the spine will instantly break, and without an official autopsy, it may look as though the animal has died of natural causes. It was at this point, that I devised a plan. I took Ol' Tom out to the mop sink, for a thorough bath. I fetched some of my girlfriends Bath and Body Works scented fragrant body wash. After a thorough soaping and rinsing, I went and fetched my old blow dryer, which I had no further use for, except in situations such as this.
I'll have to admit, when I got through with Ol' Tom, he was still a little stiff, but looked good as new. By now, it was around 3am, so I fetched a pipe and headed out to the porch to sit a spell. I wanted to patiently survey my surroundings, to make sure that everyone was still nestled snugly in their beds. Once I was certain that the coast was clear, I lovingly ran Ol' Tom back over to his owners front porch, and placed him carefully into his bed. Luckily for me, the heat from the blow dryer, had made him a little more pliable. I quickly scurried back to my own front porch, hoping that any Gladys Kravitz in the neighborhood was none the wiser.
The entire next day, I heard nary a word. Then a week passed, and then a month, then two, then three. At this point, I finally got my courage up, to strike up a conversation with my neighbor, to see what he thought had became of his cat. After some casual conversation, I asked, "What ever became of your buddy "Ol' Tom? I haven't seen him around in months."
He replied, "You know the strangest thing happened with that cat. He died in his sleep one night, and the next day I buried him down by the creek. Then 3 days later, he showed back up in his bed on the front porch."
"Alive?" I asked.
"No not alive." He responded.
"Well, I thought when you said 3 days, maybe we were dealing with a resurrection." I responded.
I could tell the guy was starting to get misty eyed. That's when he told me that he had buried Ol' Tom alive. He described how he went back down to the creek, and could see how Ol' Tom had clawed his way out of the grave, and must have had enough life left in him, to make it back up to the porch, and back into his favorite bed.
I responded by telling him that I have heard a lot of stories about animals making it back home under tremendous circumstances, but this one takes the cake.
I immediately told him, that he didn't need to breathe a word of this to anyone, because if the Humane Society or PETA got wind of it, the media would be camped out on both our doorsteps, and I don't want to answer any questions about what kind of neighbor he is.
He agreed with me, that discretion would be best for everyone concerned.
I turned and made my way back to the house, and there sitting at the top of the steps was Zeke, grinning from ear to ear. I petted him, got him a fresh rawhide chew, and took him back inside.
@motie2, @pipeman83, I'm glad you guys enjoyed the story. Motie, how many grams do you reckon that pipe is anyhow?
"10 Facts about Tobacco Pipes That Will Blow Your Mind" (Well, my mind wasn't blown, but I learned a few things......)
<<Smoking tobacco from a pipe is a pastime that most associate with luxury, a good time, and sometimes even fuzzy slippers. While smoking and collecting pipes has become a hobby for some, it didn’t start out that way. Check out a few of these crazy facts about smoking pipe tobacco; they just might make you enjoy that next puff a little bit more!
"10 Facts about Tobacco Pipes That Will Blow Your Mind"
7) Tobacco became famous in Europe after Christopher Columbus discovered the Americas. Once he saw that the Native American people were using it for medicinal purposes and to smoke out of pipes, he took it back to Spain with him. The tobacco plant later reached Europe in 1519 by way of Ramon Pane, a monk who accompanied Columbus on his voyage.