In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Louisiana State University .
On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.
The elephant turned to face the man and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned and walked away. Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.
Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.
Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.
A penguin is driving through Arizona on a hot summer's day when he notices his oil light is on. He gets out of the car and, sure enough, it's leaking oil all over the road.
The penguin drives around the corner to a service station and asks the mechanic to take a look at it. The mechanic says he has a few others to look at first but if he comes back in an hour he can tell the penguin what is wrong with his car. The penguin agrees and goes for a walk.
He finds an ice cream shop and thinks a big bowl of vanilla ice cream will really hit the spot since he's a penguin and it's Arizona in the summer, after all. He sits down at the counter and starts in on his ice cream. Of course he has no hands so it is rather messy. By the time he is done he has ice cream all over his flippers and his mouth - a total mess.
He walks back to the service station and says to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"
The mechanic replies, "It looks like you've blown a seal."
"Just fix the car," says the penguin. "and leave my personal life out of it!!"
Complaining about men who drive pick-up trucks but never carry anything in the the truck bed is like complaining about women who wear Uggs with their mini-skirts.
A man takes his wife to get tested for Coronavirus. 2 days later he gets a call from the lab.
Doctor: I'm sorry to inform you sir that your wife's test results have been mixed up with another patient's. We're not sure if she has COVID-19 or Alzheimer's disease.
Man: So what am I supposed to do now?!
Doctor: I'd recommend taking her for a long walk and leaving her, if she finds her way back home, don't open the door.
Solutions to our world’s problems already exist just by taking what we find in little metal tins, and burning them for pleasure in our pipes. Why is it only a select few of us can see it?
@motie2 I can relate to that last post. I made an order from Esterval's in Germany on May 28th. I just received notice that it has arrived in the U.S. and is headed for Customs. Sometimes having patience can be hard.
Comments
Trigger Warning..... a non-pc joke
A penguin is driving through Arizona on a hot summer's day when he notices his oil light is on. He gets out of the car and, sure enough, it's leaking oil all over the road.
The penguin drives around the corner to a service station and asks the mechanic to take a look at it. The mechanic says he has a few others to look at first but if he comes back in an hour he can tell the penguin what is wrong with his car. The penguin agrees and goes for a walk.
He finds an ice cream shop and thinks a big bowl of vanilla ice cream will really hit the spot since he's a penguin and it's Arizona in the summer, after all. He sits down at the counter and starts in on his ice cream. Of course he has no hands so it is rather messy. By the time he is done he has ice cream all over his flippers and his mouth - a total mess.
He walks back to the service station and says to the mechanic, "Did you find out what is wrong with my car?"
The mechanic replies, "It looks like you've blown a seal."
"Just fix the car," says the penguin. "and leave my personal life out of it!!"
Too much?
If Dickens and Tolkien had collaborated...
Complaining about men who drive pick-up trucks but never carry anything in the the truck bed is like complaining about women who wear Uggs with their mini-skirts.
Don’t let him in, I don’t think that’s is a bear suit😬
I think you may be right. The road construction noise seems to have scared him off, so no worries.
Why is it only a select few of us can see it?
I can relate to that last post. I made an order from Esterval's in Germany on May 28th. I just received notice that it has arrived in the U.S. and is headed for Customs.
Sometimes having patience can be hard.