Home General

Staving Off Tobacco Breath - Altoids

Regardless of the tobacco leaf you choose be it Virginia, Burley, Latakia, Cigar Leaf, Perique, Orientals or Turkish - or your preference of blends: bold smoky English, heavily cased flavorful aromatics, or a premium topless non-aromatic ... there is one inescapable conclusion to that satisfying bowl ... smokers breath.

There I said it! I'm not proud. But I feel strangely liberated, like a repentant alcoholic stepping up to the podium confronting his demon head-on. "Hello, my name is Joe ... and my breath smells like an unwashed motel ashtray after smoking."

There is no getting around it, so before coming in contact with a fellow human being I immediately pop an Altoids breath mint into my mouth. I keep a small supply handy, rattling loosely in my pants pocket. Preferably my watch pocket. And pocket lint be damned! I'd rather suck on a fuzzy breath mint then find myself in the uncomfortable position of an impromptu face-to-face conversation. Even when I'm outside in my own backyard I'll pop-in an Altoids after smoking, knowing full well that I'm headed directly to the bathroom to brush my teeth. Don't want to bump into my wife somewhere in between with a mouthful of post-smoking funk. I've made it a point to keep my pipe smoking hobby as unobtrusive and positive an experience to those non-smokers around me - which is why I only smoke aromatic blends with a pleasant room note. And keeping a fresh breath afterward is more important then leaving behind a room note that tricks people into believing you've just baked a cake.  

Oh, and a word of warning - keep away from the Cinnamon Altoids after a good long smoke. If the pipe smoking didn't give you tongue bite - the Cinnamon Altoids will.

No better way for a Newcomer to ingratiate one's self into the Pipe Smoking Community then by insulting the entire membership by telling them their breath stinks. Please take this with the humor intended.     

Comments

Sign In or Register to comment.